What Is prayer?

Please ask our rector Janet Spence, if you would like support or more information about how to discover more about prayer and ways of praying.

An early Christian insight is that prayer is not primarily something we do by our own effort. We can perhaps clear the ground but prayer is really God’s work in us. St. Paul wrote: ‘the Spirit helps us … for we do not know how to pray … but the Spirit herself intercedes for us with sighs too deep for words’ (Romans 8:26).

Worship with other Christians, often called ‘liturgy’, offers many ways of communal praying. Together we recite many prayers, often taken from both the Hebrew Bible and the New Testament. Personal prayer is as varied as people; what works for one does not for another. Advice to ‘pray as you can, not as you can’t’ is worth considering, as we seek the best ways for us to pray. Asking for God’s help in our seeking is already prayer.

As well as teaching his disciples what we call the Our Father or The Lord’s Prayer, Jesus also said: ‘…whenever you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret’. This personal prayer might include silence, talking to God, going for a walk in nature, writing, making music, or making things. Each of us is uniquely and unconditionally loved by God just as we are. Our ways of praying will change and develop as our relationship with God changes and develops. As Christians, we trust that we never pray alone, even when we are physically on our own.

“Be still, and know that I am God” – Silent Prayer

Many people in Western societies are unaware that silent prayer, contemplation, or meditation (call it what you will) have been part of the Christian tradition since the very earliest times.

It offers a gateway to deepening our relationship with God. Although simple guidelines can help get us started, it is not about a method, or getting something right. It is not another skill we have to learn. Our efforts are not really what is important. God knows that you are seeking God and is not going to judge you harshly, but welcomes your attempts, however faltering or modest they may feel. 

The important thing is simply to sit there for the length of time that you have decided (long or short), and to stick at it, every day. If you can learn to just sit silently and attentively, you will discover (and those who know you are likely to notice) changes in yourself. These might include becoming more loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind and good, faithful, gentle, or more in control of your thoughts, feelings, and reactions; changes expressing what St Paul describes as ‘fruits of the Spirit’ (Galatians 5:22-23)

Finding the discipline to take regular time in silence alone can be hard. It can feel very helpful to join a group with others who are drawn to being silent in prayer, to encourage and learn rom eachother. At Holy Cross, we are fortunate to have two regular groups. You can find details on the Services page.

Prayer for Discernment – The Examen

Spending time learning to discern the sometimes subtle presence and promptings of God in our ordinary, everyday life can be deeply rewarding . The “Examen” is a very old form of prayer that helps us to do this

It invites us, day by day, to spend time reflecting on what has happened and to identify the moments that have brought us alive, as well as those that deadened us in some way. We ask God to help us each day, to look out for what brings us life, and find ways of moving away from the things that deaden us. In this way we can become more aware of God’s presence as we go about our daily activities, and more attuned to how God might be inviting us to grow into ever fuller life.

Jesuits In Britain offer a comprehensive introduction to The Examen, as well as resources and information about St Ignatius, and the origins of this form of prayer.

Some resources to support personal prayer can help us pray:

Pray As You Go
Pray wherever life takes you – whether you’re on a busy commute, taking a quiet walk, or simply finding a moment of stillness in your day! The Pray As You Go app is designed to accompany you on your spiritual journey, offering guided prayers and reflections that fit seamlessly into your daily routine. A new prayer session is produced every day. It is not a ‘Thought for the Day’, a sermon, or a bible-study, but rather a framework for your own prayer. Lasting between ten and thirteen minutes, it combines music, scripture, and some questions for reflection.

The World Community for Christian Meditation
The WCCM is a global spiritual community united in the practice and promotion of meditation in the Christian tradition. Their website offers extensive information and resources to support meditative prayer, as well as links to groups meditating together across the world, in person and online.

From time to time we offer opportunities to explore ways of praying. Keep an eye out for these on our website and Facebook

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